WEDDING HINTS & TIPS | WHEN TO DO THE WEDDING SPEECHES
When Should You Do Your Wedding Speeches?
As with all my wedding hints and tips — whether in blog posts or videos — everything I share is based on real experiences from real weddings I’ve photographed. Nothing here is a rulebook, and I’m definitely not telling you how to run your day. Think of this more as friendly advice between mates — a few observations to help you decide what works best for you.
When it comes to wedding speech timings, there are three main options. In my experience, one works really well, one is totally fine, and one… well, I’d probably avoid if you can.
Of course, any plan around speeches needs to be discussed with your wedding venue or caterers. They’ll need to know in advance so they can make sure the food is timed right and nothing goes cold while someone’s doing a 25-minute speech about the stag do.
Option One - Wedding speeches BEFORE the food - Pros Vs. Cons
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PROS |
CONS |
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The room is clean with no plates or empty wine bottles everywhere, this makes for more cleaner and less clutter wedding speech photos. |
If you are having a later wedding breakfast and people haven’t eaten for some time, people can often get fidgety and just want to get to the food and to not listen to speeches before they get to eat. |
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The wedding guests and you guys will be looking you best, most people when they have eaten start taking off jackets, ties etc.. and you won’t have spilled anything down you at this point! |
If your speeches go on longer than agreed with the venue, then the kitchen / caterers will start to get worried and may have to cut the speeches short as the food will be getting either burnt or going cold. |
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It means the people doing the speeches have got them out the way and can enjoy the food. |
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Everyone will be in the room and focused on the speeches rather than be spread out around the venue, which tends to happen after the wedding breakfast. |
Option Two - Wedding speeches AFTER the food - Pros Vs. Cons
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PROS |
CONS |
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If you are having a later wedding breakfast and maybe the ceremony has fallen at a time when people were not sure if they should eat before the wedding, having the food before the speeches, means that everyone is nice and full and no longer hungry. |
The people doing the speeches will have to sit through the food before getting their speeches out the way and so may not enjoy the food. |
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For the venue, it means they can have the food ready for the start of the wedding breakfast and don’t have to worry about how long the speeches will be going on for and if the food is going to go cold or even burnt. |
I have seen people drinking so much as they are nervous about doing the speeches that they are too drunk to do their speech… |
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The room will look messy, no matter the venue, as the tables will have empty bottles, glasses, the napkins that have been used will be thrown on the tables etc.. this will be shown in the images. |
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The guests will not look their best as they will have removed their jackets, ties etc.. so they can enjoy the food. |
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In the summer months, after the food people tend to drift, they go to the bar, they go outside to enjoy the sun, have a smoke etc.. and people do end up missing the speeches or even making a scene coming back into the room during the speeches. |
Option Three - Wedding speeches DURING the food - Pros Vs. Cons
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PROS |
CONS |
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There are no positives to doing the speeches during the different courses! |
See all the cons above – having your speeches during the courses has all the cons and zero benefits |
Final Thoughts
As I said in the intro — I’m not here to tell you there’s a “right” or “wrong” way to do things. Most couples have never planned a wedding before, and if I can offer a bit of insight from the hundreds of weddings I’ve seen, I genuinely hope it helps with your planning.
If it were me, I’d go with speeches before the meal. The room will look its best — guests are still fresh, the decor is untouched, and there’s no chance of someone spilling red wine down their dress or shirt before the toasts! It also gives the speakers a chance to relax and enjoy the meal without nerves hanging over them.
My second choice would be speeches after the food, which is probably just as popular these days. I think venues often suggest this option because it keeps their kitchen timings simple — they can serve the food hot without any delays, and then slot in the speeches afterwards.
The third option — speeches during the meal — is one I’d strongly avoid.
It started popping up in late 2021 and has crept into a few more weddings since, but in my opinion, it’s the worst of all worlds.
The room looks messy (like it does after food), guests are distracted, and the vibe is all over the place. Plus, at many venues, not all tables will have been served by the time the first speech starts — so you’ll end up with the sound of knives and forks clinking through the speeches, and people not really paying attention.
It’s hard to create a nice atmosphere when half the room is eating and half is trying to listen.
So, in short:
Speeches before the meal: The winner — relaxed, tidy, great light, and good vibes.
Speeches after the meal: Solid choice, especially if it keeps the venue happy.
Speeches during the meal: Avoid if you can. Messy, noisy, and a bit awkward.
Whatever you choose, I’ll be there to capture the reactions, the laughter, the tears — and maybe a few awkward jokes that don’t quite land (it happens!). If you’re unsure what will work best at your venue, just ask — always happy to help.
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